I've always just been slow about growing up. It just takes more time for me.
I'm not proud of this, but what can you do? There's always been food on the table and I've never been forced to defend my life. Summertime, and the livin' is easy, so the tune goes.
Case-in-point: Even until my third year of college, I still very much believed in the exceptionalism of my heroes. Counted among my heroes were BMX riders. I do not apologize for this, but I was twenty-fucking-one.
Landon and I (and I think some other heads- we did have friends) were at a bar downtown. Might have been the bar right next to Creekside, but I can't be sure. So we're drinking, standing around, and in the corner, behind the pool table, is Tony Cardona.
Tony "more-sausage-on-that-pizza and toss me a Mickey's" Cardona. BMX legend. Chicago-gone-PA-gone-Austin transplant with mean transition skills and a rather miniscule fear of death. And a drinking problem, but whatever.
A very decent video had just come out, some of it show-casing Tony's incredible talents on a bike. I had seen it, and it had made me all gooey inside. SO- we're in the bar, he's in the bar, and I'm like,
"Fuck it. I'm gonna go give this dude some propers. Propers when due! I wanna let him know I dig his riding." I was gonna be that asshole, making it weird. I'm always that asshole.
It didn't go the way I envisioned it going in my head. Mostly 'cause, from across the room, I couldn't tell that Tony was so drunk he could barely stand. I moved in, told him he was Tony Cardona (which I'm sure, even in his current state, he knew) and shook his hand. I told him I thought his video part killed and that it was great to meet him in person.
What he replied back to me- I'll never know. Mouth full of marbles, head full of booze. A jumbled fucking mess. He slurred, quite literally, every fucking word.
But he smiled, and seemed happy. He shreds still, and his legend grows.
I learned something that night. Hero-worship is unhealthy. I can picture someone reading this and thinking,
"Yeah...and get better fucking heroes! He rides a goddamn child's toy for a living."
And to that individual, I say,
SHUT UP, YOU DICK!
